Intimacy and dentures

Thank you very much dor your input. I did talk to my husband about my feelings and he was supportive. Still don't want him to see me without them! I'm very self-conscious about my appearance.  Call it vanity or whatever.  Maybe in time I'll feel more comfortable about it.  Thanks again.

As noted, you are not the first to raise this issue. Your husband is your closest supporter on this. It is very important that he share in all experiences about your dentures. The more he understands about your feelings both physical and emotional the better able he will be to help you normalize your new situation. I am sure he is curious about many aspects of your recovery and normalizing intimacy will help both of you. You both need to explore this new you! Being a denture wearer myself, I worried about this and my husband and I discussed how we might go about handling things. I had begun wearing a partial denture when I was in college and things went down hill from there. When we were first engaged, he was the only man outside of the dentist whom I allowed to see without my partial. It took a lot to let him into that world. As more teeth were added and finally all of the remaining ones removed to make way for my full dentures we took small steps into that world.

I routinely sleep without my teeth in and intimacy is a regular part of our life. He understands my need to remove my teeth and accepts it. He loves me- not my teeth if that makes sense. Do what is comfortable for both of you but do not shut him out of this part of your life. You might be surprised at what you may find. It is all good!

I agree that you should discuss the issuing of sleeping in your dentures with your dentist.  However, I don't think he or she (or anyone else who doesn't have dentures) will be able to really understand how you feel. Also, if you have ever taken a nap with your dentures, you know that your gums feel kind of funny afterward and your dentures are less than pristine and pleasant afterward.

There are many women who feel the same way that you do.  Some of them find times during the day to rest their gums and, therefore, wear their dentures at night.  Some of them ignore the issue of possible bone deterioration resulting from "over wearing" of dentures and wear them all the time (other than when they are cleaning them or they are in the shower).  Some of them wear their dentures until intimacy (or the prospect of it) is over for the night.  

Despite your best efforts, eventually, your husband will see you without your dentures -- he will awaken in the middle of the night -- or he will walk-in while you are cleaning your dentures -- or you will have to take your dentures out because they hurt -- or you will be sick -- or you will need to respond quickly to an emergency.  And, when he does see you, he will be fine with seeing you (and more) without your dentures.  The less fuss you make about the issue, the less problmatic it will be for him.  Your husband is probably waiting for the opportunity to tell you (or show you) that it's okay.  

You need to keep a few things in mind: first, having your husband (or your significant other) see you without your dentures is not like appearing in public without your dentures; second, dentures are like makeup in that just as you look better with makeup, you look better with dentures; third, you are the same person with or without dentures; and fourth, your appearance without dentures (and/or the fact that you wear them) is of much greater importance to you than it is to anyone else.  It took me a while to really "get" these things, but I have been much happier with myself since I did.

Good luck.

I'm Karen, the Fixodent Community Manager.  I'm glad you came to the message board for advice, as I'm sure there are others who have felt the same way you feel right now.  While I haven't been through this situation, I would encourage you to be open with your husband and let him know how you're feeling.  Your husband married you for who you are, and I don't think he'll think less of you without your teeth.  After you share your thoughts with him, try to ease yourself into allowing him to see you without your teeth.

With that said, it's very important to remove your dentures to clean them every night.  Whether or not you put them back in before going to bed is up to you and your dentist.  Many dentists recommend leaving them out at night, as this gives your gums a chance to relax from the pressure of the denture being in during the day.  But there are circumstances where a dentist may advise to wear dentures overnight.  A discussion with your dentist can determine which is best for you.

^Karen